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Faith
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Being a 22 Year-Old Virgin

February 3
by
Anonymus
in
Creative Outlets
with
.

I am a 22-year-old college senior who is about to graduate. I am a funny, smart, beautiful, kind and caring woman with a bright future. I am a Christian. I have very strong values and morals. I am a virgin.

Every single one of these traits has been tested in the past 4 years I’ve been at college. Gossip and drama has tested my ability to be kind and caring. Hard classes and long clinical days have tested my intelligence and perseverance. Nothing, however, has been tested more than my morals, my values… my virginity.

Ever since I learned about sex I knew I wanted to wait until marriage.

It wasn’t the church or my parents pushing that ideal in my head, in fact, I never even had ‘the sex talk’ with my parents. It has been 100% my decision to wait. Now, the bases of my decision is religious. I believe that my body is a temple created by God [1 Corinthians 6:19] and I believe I need to treat it that way. I want to bring Glory to the Lord in every way that I can, and this is just one of those ways.

Just because I don’t have sex doesn’t mean I don’t want sex. I am not perfect. I have messed up, I’ve given into temptation, and I’ve gone further than I should have sometimes. But every one of those times I stopped, I didn’t give into my needs and wants because in the back of my head, in my heart were those strong convictions

College is a very difficult place to practice abstinence. I have never been made fun of or picked on because of my beliefs, but it definitely sets me apart from others. I cannot begin to count the number of boys who as soon as they found out I don’t have sex, couldn’t get away fast enough. Boys don’t even give you a chance and it hurts.

Having this strong conviction in my life has not been easy. I’ve gotten depressed and felt exiled. I have felt insecure and embarrassed. There have even been times I have almost said ‘screw it’ and just given in to stop the hardship.

Most recently I was talking to a boy. It was a very new thing, but I quickly found that he was someone that I knew I really was going to like and truly care about. He was over one night and when I stopped and told him I was a virgin, that I wasn’t going to do anything with him, he stood up, shook my hand and walked out.

Shook my hand, and walked out. I have never felt more worthless in my life.

I felt like all I was good for was my body, that because I wouldn’t put out that I was completely worthless. It was in that moment that I felt the worse I have ever felt.

I felt hurt and sad and mad about it for about a day and then it hit me. I should be damn proud. I stood up for myself. I didn’t back down. I help firm in my beliefs, in the Lord, and didn’t let anything change me. I realized at that moment, how important it is to stay true to yourself. I know how easy it would have been to just give in, to forget my conviction and have sex. But where would that have led me?

Every belief, conviction, and value that you have make you, you. It is so important to stay true to those. Be you. Don’t let what is supposed to be the ‘normal’ change those, change you. I promise it’s so much better this way. Living for your own beliefs leads to such a fulfilling life. Regardless of what your beliefs may be, make them, keep them, and be proud of yourself.

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