I have been working as a freelancer for the past two years now. I often get asked if it’s easy and what it’s like to be self-employed, so I thought I would tell my story.

I love my freelance life and I couldn’t be happier that I made the decision to do it alone, but it hasn’t been easy and there are definitely pros and cons to both kinds of lifestyle. Whether you succeed in one or the other ,I think it comes down to what you want to achieve and what kind of person you are.

I’ve always been a very self-motivated person and found in my first ‘corporate’ job that my commitment and dedication to my career were not being rewarded adequately or quickly enough.

I stayed late and worked extra hours and was very involved in the corporate mission for greatness, but for me the time frame in this environment just didn’t cut it. I saw no direct reward for the extra effort I was putting in and being told I would be up for a pay review in 6-9 months didn’t motivate me to stay.

For some people I understand that the security of a regularly paid job, coupled with the more standard career route of rising through the ranks is a dream come true, but it turns out I wanted something different.

I don’t think I actually appreciated that I wanted to work for myself until I quit my job and went for it. I’ve never been as scared as I was when I made the decision to quit. I had worked my whole life to land that corporate city job…nearly 20 years in education!

So you can imagine my despair when I realized a year or so in that I was not as happy as I had envisioned. After a week of difficult conversations with family and friends, I quit.

I had some savings behind me, and the intention of finding a more rewarding and higher paid role. I spent a few weeks enjoying my new found freedom in the city but naturally got a little bored, so I started helping some friends with various projects, while interviewing for full-time roles.

A month or so after quitting I was involved in several freelance projects and actually being paid for most of them! I decided that I would push back finding another full time job and see how I could get on with self-employment.

I had accidentally become a freelancer. Over the first few months I taught myself a lot of new skills while doing projects at the same time. I spent hours networking, learning, and building my personal brand. I’ve never been happier.

Finding work can sometimes be difficult, but you have to have a balance between the work that you are doing for others and the time you spend on your own business development. The life of a freelancer isn’t easy.

At least one working day a week should be spent on building relationships and sourcing new work to make sure that you don’t end up finishing a project with no new work in site.

One of the biggest perks of the job for me is that I can carry on learning while I am earning. I put a lot of my cash back into my education, as a business would with its employee training. This is another really important thing to remember to make sure you stay ahead of the curve in your industry.

It is also important to get into a good work/life balance routine. It can be very easy to work all hours of the day, especially as you see more and more money coming in. However, taking a break will mean you perform better and ultimately will get more work in the long term.

It took me a while to figure this one out but now I work normal working hours, just from the comfort of my own home. I can get up slowly, exercise, have a healthy breakfast, and watch the news. I don’t have to fight with angry commuters and so I save about 2 hours a day of travel time (which I use for personal development).

The best part? I can work anywhere in the world! Right now I am writing this post from an airplane on the way to Miami.

So long as I keep in touch with clients and the work gets done, they don’t care where I am.

So now that you know my story, here are some top tips for becoming a top notch freelancer and kicking ass at life:

• Learn how to sell yourself… Don’t give your work away for free. Friends and clients will always ask for favors but know your day rate and stick to it. If you don’t value your work, others won’t either.
• Know what your time is worth. Here’s the simple math that all freelancer’s use when they are offered a job: first decide on your hourly rate (it might be £20 for someone starting out, £100 or more for someone more established). Then divide the payment offered by how many hours you think the job will take. If it doesn’t match or exceed your minimum rate, consider taking a pass.
• Find the right workspace. If you have the perfect home office, then problem solved. If not, consider a table in a library (if you crave quiet) or a perch in a favorite coffee bar (if you need people around). A co-working office space like those offered by WeWork is the best of both worlds: a professional environment filled with other creative people who are just as passionate about their work as you are. Personally, I love sitting in Starbucks.
• Be an expert in something. Sure, you can be a jack-of-all-trades, but the best way to break into freelancing is to impress clients with your knowledge of a particular subject. If marketing is your bag, consider which elements you prefer (i.e. PR / Social Media etc.) and pick a niche.
• Be pleasant to work with. Almost as important as taking deadlines seriously. Freelancers who get hired again and again are the ones who make a client’s life easier.
• Work your network. It is who you know that matters or, more importantly, who knows you! So get out there and get connecting!
• Know, and use, social media. Use Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, LINKEDIN —any social media platforms, really—to get the word out about work you’ve completed. It doesn’t just get the word out about that one piece: it helps promote you as a freelancer and might help get you future jobs.
• Keep on top of business administration.  Record your projects and deadlines. Include when you sent your invoice, for how much, and when you were paid. You’ll thank me for this one later.

Being a freelancer comes with its risks and rewards, but, for me, it has been one of the best decisions that I’ve ever made.

Being captain on the leadership council for the gymnastics team has taught me that becoming a leader is downright one of the most important aspects of being successful. But what’s even more important than being a leader is being a good leader.

Seth Godin’s book, Tribes, gave me a lot of insight on the traits of a leader, especially in terms of comparing a leader to a boss. Since I was named a member of the leadership council for the Rutgers Gymnastics team, I connected to Tribes on a personal level.

Being a good leader is about opening yourself up and connecting with your tribe to reach a common goal.

As a captain I use my personal beliefs, as well as new ideas I have learned, to push my team towards our goals on a daily basis.

Gymnastics

One idea that I have always felt strongly about that was touched upon in Tribes was the idea of not doing something for glory, but instead because you genuinely want to help.

“Which is true of all great leaders…They’re generous. They exist to help the tribe find something, to enable the tribe to thrive. But they understand that the most powerful way to enable is to be statue-worthy.” – Seth Godin.

Leaders want nothing more than to achieve their goals with people they care about and respect. They are open to ideas from tribe members and go out of their way to connect with these people.

This is my passion and this is why I enjoy my role on the gymnastics team as a captain in the leadership council.

Making personal connections with my team forms trust and makes the team work as a whole.
A tribe won’t reach a goal without the support and dedication from each member. If trust is formed, team members are more likely to follow my lead and trust the process.

“He didn’t tell them what to do. He didn’t manage the effort; he led it.” – Seth Godin.

Leading by example to me means not only leading in the physical aspect of gymnastics, but also in the leading aspect in itself. A boss is most interested in results, and doesn’t specifically care about the learning process to achieve these results. In my opinion, the process is when character is built and knowledge is gained.

Personally, I try to fine tune the process and focus on the small details, because that’s when habits are formed and greatness is achieved. Bosses don’t necessarily care about forming connections with their employees. Forming connections with other members of my tribe is not only a genuine hobby of mine, but it is key for our success.

While reading Tribes I couldn’t help but relate it to being a captain on the leadership council for the gymnastics team. Good leaders are vital to a tribe if they want to reach, or even surpass their goals. Just like in the book, I make it a point to lead my team and tribe by example. Because of this, I form trustworthy bonds between my teammates and do what I love to do.

I remember my first day in school at Georgia Military College. It was quiet on campus. The freshly cut green yard had signs that said, “No walking on grass.” The buildings, looming with castle-like features, faced each other across that untouchable landscape. Where in the world was I? Was this college?  What kind of hard work would I have to do here? It definitely didn’t look like the movies.

That was the question I asked myself when I attended the first day of school at Georgia Military College (GMC). I had always dreamed of going to college, playing next-level soccer, and that the military was a part of that dream. Georgia Military College had that perfect mesh, or so I thought. In the end, however, I must tell you that GMC was quite frankly one of my only choices.

Let’s quickly rewind to the last year of my high school career. I had one of the best senior classes. The high school football season was incredible. Soccer was my life and I was deeply set on going to the next level by being a part of travel teams and a state-bound varsity team. I was attending other sporting events, painting up, hanging out at house parties, and preparing myself for prom and graduation.

The only thing I was worried about was enjoying the last few months with my friends and making sure they were to die for. I was definitely not worried about hard work or life after high school.

Then, I noticed something quite peculiar about my friends. They were all getting acceptance letters from schools… University of Georgia. Georgia Tech. Alabama. Auburn. Georgia Southern.

I had been in contact with tons of soccer coaches around the nation to join a college team, but I had no acceptance papers to waive in the air. I was never in that sort of rush. Once I saw some of my friends’ acceptance letters, I realized my time in high school was coming to an end.

I remember going home and emailing a lot of my coaches and seeing how I could finalize the signing process. The only problem was that I was afraid my grades were not going to get me far. That was one thing I did not put the most attention toward in high school.

I had many schools at the top of my list, but at the end of the day, many of them did not have me at the top of their list. In the finale of my high school days, I chose my best match, Georgia Military College, because of the potential soccer scholarship, military ideals, small size, the good price, and the proximity to home, and… because they accepted me.

Now, back to that first day at Georgia Military College. The only people I saw were military-dressed students lining up in formation outside one of the buildings.

Two older gentlemen, dressed in army camouflage breezed by me as I watched others in formation. I could see two edges of campus, given how relatively small in size the school’s property was. A single flag pole stood in the middle to break the uneasy silence, crackling in the late summer wind.

The semester began fast and, before I knew it, soccer was starting too. After a few weeks, I wasn’t sure if I had made the right choice. I remember thinking how I had let myself down in high school by not having the right mindset and how that culminated to where I was. GMC was almost too small – smaller than my high school actually.

It was close to home, but the town did not offer a quarter of what my hometown offered. On top of everything, I kept getting crushed by the response of people when I told them I was attending a junior college. I could sense that people considered junior college students as underachievers. It’s a stigma all community college students face.

I dreaded going to class. I didn’t feel at home and I didn’t feel like I was meeting many people. I felt like I was making no progress. I wanted to leave.

I researched other schools while I was in class. “Anything,” I thought. I looked around in the state of Georgia and even out of state. Where could I go that was more traditional? Where would I get accepted? I applied to Kennesaw State University (KSU), where most of my closest friends went.

I was going to get out of Georgia Military College and move on to bigger things, I thought. However, within a month, KSU replied back. I vividly remember opening that letter in front of my parents, who knew the bad news before I did. “Unfortunately,” it read atop the page. I was not accepted. I was crushed. I was officially stuck in a town where I felt I didn’t belong and stuck at a school where I felt I was going to make no progress.

The next semester started and I promised myself that I would be more attentive to school and that I would get more involved – something I had never really paid full attention too. I thought if I worked my tail off, maybe I could get into Kennesaw State University the following year.

I studied every night. I read the textbooks. I went to the library. I never missed a class – not even my 7:50am classes. I focused on putting in the time on the soccer field. No more video games. No more wasting time. I started working a job at a sandwich restaurant in order to gain some capital for whichever school was next. My life was moving. I noticed an increase in my GPA and I was making the Dean’s List. My bank account had also increased. My soccer team was doing better than it had ever done in the history of the school.

I felt like everything was working out toward that ultimate goal of transferring. The best news, however, was when I heard in one of my classes that there was an invite-only honor society for students, which helped most students get into large four-year universities. I talked to my teacher after class and tried to figure out how I could get involved.

I thought that they could help me transfer. She saw my GPA and then told me that it was possible that I could get a letter in the mail. I waited and waited and it finally arrived: one of the most pivotal moments in my life. I called my parents and begged them to help me with the membership fees.

The next semester I was inducted into Phi Theta Kappa (PTK). I felt on top of the world. I reviewed what I did and realized that if I focused more and gave more effort then more things would happen like PTK. So I focused more and gave more effort. I was elected Chapter President of Phi Theta Kappa at my school (Alpha Omicron Epsilon) and then selected as Phi Theta Kappa Regional President.

I helped host the Regional Convention and I earned the Distinguished Order of the Leader Servant Award, which represented 100+ hours of community service. I met with the mayor of our town, the president of our school, and many other distinguished people. I couldn’t believe what I had reached and the experiences I was having. I didn’t want to leave.

This school was the exact opposite of what I thought. The culture was amazing. The people and faculty were like family. Everything I wanted in a school was right in front of me the whole time.

The problem was that I had never given it enough – but when I did, the door to opportunity opened up right in front of me.

My last semester approached of junior college and it was time for the next step: applying to a four-year university. It was a weird experience for me, having already been let down by other schools. Georgia Military College was where I wanted to be.

I didn’t think I would have a better time anywhere else. Then, I thought to myself, “Corey, this school is a stepping stone. It is where you realized your potential. It’s where you realized what it takes to be successful. Now replicate you hard work at the next school. Make your impact on a larger scale.”

My faculty, advisors, and PTK members helped me begin the process that every student in junior college goes through: transferring to a larger university. It is very common to receive an Associate’s Degree and then continue on towards a Bachelor’s – its’ actually the new norm.

My dad told me to create a list and do research on what each school offered. He told me to dream big and to not limit myself. I started creating a list and of course Kennesaw State was at the top… I knew that I could get in now. I remember speaking with dad and he said, “You know there are more schools than KSU right? Why don’t you try some other ones?” Eventually, after I did my research, I realized he was right.

My list extended and Kennesaw dropped to 9th of 15 possibilities. Schools like Georgia Tech, The University of Florida, Florida State University, Flagler College, Auburn University, The University of Georgia, University of Central Florida, and The University of South Florida were on the list (not in that order). I couldn’t believe it, but every school I wanted to go to was now an option.

I applied to each one and the first one to come back was the one I had longed for… Kennesaw State. “Accepted.” I showed my parents and then shared with all of my friends that I had been accepted.

The decision to attend KSU was made before I could realize it. Even though I had put Kennesaw at 9th, it bolted back to the top. I was looking up where to live, talking to friends who lived there, and looking at everything 50 times on their website. It was going to be incredible.

Then, a letter came in a few weeks later: The University of Georgia. The most prestigious and traditional school in my state.

The school that students with perfect GPA’s and SAT scores got denied from. The outside of the envelope said it all, “Accepted.” I couldn’t believe it. The University of Georgia accepted me.

Suddenly, my dreams of attending Kennesaw were sent into limbo. I laid both envelopes on my desk and watched many others come in over the next few weeks. Most were hand-written and some with special offerings and educational scholarships. With a little hard work, things were beginning to fall in place… I was always set on going to Kennesaw, but after a long decision process, and a talk with my parents, The University of Georgia would be my next home.

There is a major quote that is probably over said that I would like to share. It is and probably always will be my favorite quote: “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always got.” – Antony Robbins. The truth of that quote is far more than I can explain in my college story and it speaks wonders to me.

By working hard and changing what I always did, things began to change for me. I had been accepted to The University of Georgia. After attending the Phi Theta Kappa National Conference in San Jose, California, I was offered a position with the World Leading Learning Company, Pearson Education.

I have since then been promoted to Regional Coordinator position in the Pearson Campus Ambassador Program. I also participated as a Social Media Strategist and started my own blog, coreygeary, which has produced over 7,000 views to date.

I have traveled to San Jose, New York City, Disney World, Boston, and I look to travel to San Antonio and San Francisco this year all thanks to the opportunities at my job and school. I have given speeches in front of students and wrote many articles on why students need to give it their all. I am currently a senior at The University of Georgia where I attend classes at The Terry College of Business, one of the nation’s most prestigious undergraduate business schools.

I have also taken on the role of a second job in student housing. In May of 2016, I will graduate with a Bachelors of Business Administration in Management. On top of all of that, I am currently co-founding a business that focuses on the importance of mentorship to students, which will make its debut in the fall of 2016. Life is moving forward at light speed.

I am just an example of the thousands of students who change their future – whether they start in Junior College or not. It doesn’t matter where you come from or where you are; you control your future.

From what I knew four years ago out of high school to now, the most important lesson I can reiterate is that quote by Antony Robbins. If I had stayed on that path of doing just enough and quitting when things got too bad to go back to old ways, then I would have not had the experiences that I’ve had. It’s about being persistent and making the change you want to see. You are what you make yourself.

One last note: If it wasn’t for the people I’m about to thank, that change would have been very hard to accomplish. I want to personally thank my mom and dad for being by my side every step of the way. Being a first generation college student has a lot of pressure on a family and you two took all of the pressure off of me with your support and love.

Thank you to Mrs. Zipperer, Lt. Col. Edward Shelor, and Celes Mason for molding me into a leader and showing me the way to success at Georgia Military College. Thank you to Pearson and Kara Manis for giving me a chance to lead and create, and to be a part of the Pearson Family. Thank you Allison Jones for being a mentor far before you were my official mentor.

Thank you to my family and friends, and importantly those who walked with me at Georgia Military College and at Phi Theta Kappa who took on a similar mission. I couldn’t have done it alone.

The world is constantly changing, especially the world we call home in the United States. Our economy, political views, social views, business ideas, and individual beliefs are influenced by change, and more importantly those who initiate it.

The rest of the world surrounding us is influenced by its own change. Therefore, change is not the same for everyone or every country. Some accept change, and others may not, however it is evident that it has a firm grasp on how we perceive.

In our economy, people are accepting that capitalism should be replaced by controlled socialism; people like Bernie Sanders and those who follow him. Bernie Sanders is an initiator of change. He holds views that he believes will benefit the economy; views that are very different from the traditional sense of capitalism. Donald Trump, the leading Republican candidate, is obviously a change from the traditional sense of Republican/ conservative belief. Although he may hold some conservative ideas, it is clear that, as he leads the Republican polls, he is also one that initiates change in our economy and view of politics. He accepts that certain things must be subject to change, which connects the ideas of contradiction and change.

Contradiction and change can go hand in hand. Both ideas are viewed in different lights, but technically they can mean the same thing.

For example, Bernie Sanders would like to bring socialist ideas to a purely capitalist country- is this change or contradiction? Donald Trump is changing the way that people understand politics through control of the media. He is contradicting the idea of professionalism, and how our presidential candidates represent themselves and their parties. He, quite literally, has every Republican candidate battling against him because his views are contradictory to traditional conservatism. But people follow him, and they believe in him. Now how do contradiction and change tie into each other, and our topic of a Level 5 leader? And what defines a level 5 leader?

A level 5 leader is the perfect contradiction. They are one who accepts change, but also holds views that must remain to benefit everyone. They are one who lives their life both professionally and personally. They are one who produces ideas that primarily benefit their own predicament, but does so in order to benefit those around them. This sounds like a positive contradiction, but contradiction has always been viewed in a negative light.

Chuck Blakeman discusses a change in how businesses can be run in a Tedx MileHigh lecture. The change he talks about is from an industrial point of view to what he calls “participation.” Many people may find this change contradictory to the idea of capitalism that we, as an economy, so desperately follow. For example, leaders are defined by how well their ideas benefit everyone within and outside the company; not by position or title that has been given. “Participation,” Chuck says, is not having standard work hours, but working when it is needed to benefit the business. Work becomes a group process, not an individual job. The “Participation” business not only uses a Level 5 leader to its full potential, but does well in training others to become leaders themselves.

Standard leaders of corporations today resort to traditional hierarchies of leadership with strictly defined jobs for individuals. Blakeman initiates change in his lecture by innovating the way that people can work to not only benefit the company by reaching optimal output through groups, but also by redefining how an individual can become a leader inside and outside of the workplace.

As individuals learn how to benefit each other, and not just themselves, all will learn how to accept change by understanding others’ perspectives of the world of business and how it can be run.

In conclusion, change and contradiction have never been simple. Implementing laws in politics is an annual, if not a decadal process. Our economy is structured by traditional business, businesses that have been failing us as an economy. Other, thriving businesses, like Apple and Google, have begun changing the idea of a workplace, however the traditional sense of work remains. Many of these businesses go into bankruptcy due to bad leadership. The idea of a Level 5 leader explains that it does not take one individual to lead a group, but it takes one individual to teach how others can lead groups of their own.

As we become more capable of leadership as individuals, our economy and population will more strongly represent the leader-esque nation we have chosen to become, and continue to be.

In my twenty years of existence, I have never experienced what Jim Collins, author of Good to Great, refers to as level five leadership. Many people like to say they have great leadership qualities, but Collins exposes the truth that most people do not know what it means to be effective in leading a group.

I have been a part of many organizations that attempt to teach younger people how to lead others such as the Boy Scouts of America, my fraternity, student counsel and various athletic teams, but all of these groups only teach one how to be a competent manager.

This idea of leadership has always been a vague character trait that society says is important to have, yet has been taught to me as a quality that resembles authority and discipline rather than togetherness and humility.

Going into my junior year of high school, I experienced a flawed system of leadership when I joined the football team. Regimented and brutal practices were supposed to be the binding factors of our team which would bring us together to defeat our rival, and former state champion school, which we would play for our first game of the season that year.

However, there was a clear separation within our team of those who were varsity level and those who were not. In a sense this created two different teams on the practice field, but we were all supposed to be one unified group.

Our leadership, the coaches, gave special attention to the more qualified athletes leaving most of us wondering why we were on the team in the first place. Collins refers to this type of leadership as level three as my coaches only managed us, told us what to do, but never had any real influence over our desire to improve to varsity standards. Similarly, those who were on the varsity team followed this mindset and only focused on their ability in order to win against our rival.

This type of culture lead to what Marc Andreessen calls “The Law of Crappy People”, where the abilities of an organization converge to the quality of work of its least capable person. Due to the fact that myself and many others felt we did not have anything to contribute to the team and did not feel unified, we slacked off. Many of us did not have the motivation or desire to get to the varsity level because we were always pushed to the side, told to lift more weights, run more by our managers, coaches.

This did not go unnoticed and for those on the verge of starting on Friday nights, mediocrity was a simple solution after a long day at school and they too were standing with us on the sideline. Our coaches could have gone to the next level of leader ship, level four, and been influential in creating a desire to be better every day and wanting to be at practice by incorporating us, but in their eyes we were not all star players. Nonetheless, at the end of each long practice we were told we are going to beat our rivals come the first game and that we would win every game that season.

After reading the ideas put forth by Collins, this is the worst thing they could have told us.

Having our leadership tell us after every training session that we were going undefeated that season goes directly against what Collins refers to as “Confronting the Brutal Facts”. This concept, also known as the “Stockdale Paradox”, revolves around the idea that one cannot be too optimistic when facing large tasks and that one must be realistic in analyzing the abilities of oneself or a group.

Our team was not better than our former state champion rivals, yet every day we were told we would beat them. So much confidence was cultivated even though we knew we were a smaller team, our defense had poor secondary coverage, and our star running back was always in the trainer’s office for a bad knee. When it came time to play our rivals we were up by a touchdown at the half and our team was ecstatic. However, with a limited varsity lineup and our running back getting injured in the third quarter, we lost by three touchdowns. That season we only won four of our twelve games with no chance of making it to the playoffs.

I joined the football team because I heard of the hard work and discipline I would be taught, as well as the leadership qualities that I could refine. I found myself in an awkward grey area because I had not played since I was younger and therefore was not the best of the best.

The leadership I encountered was there to manage my actions, not to teach and grow a strong culture of like-minded young men.

A level five leader has the ability to combine their own goals with humility to strengthen a group of people, take blame for mistakes and further the overall quality of a structured culture. In my current leadership positions, I try to avoid the idea that I am great and focus more on the belief that we, the people in my organization, are great.

Too often leadership is placed on a resume without a second thought as many people do not want to believe that they are poor leaders, though this mistake is a destructive one because they are not facing the brutal fact that leadership is not a trait one attains and has forever, it is worked on and refined every day.

There have been many times in my life where there was good and bad leadership. Whether it was in a classroom or playing sports, leadership played a big role in my life.

I was able to watch the leaders throughout my life and learn from their good ideas and bad mistakes. According to Jim Collins, in his book GOOD TO GREAT, there are five different levels of leadership. The leadership is ranked from level 1, being the most common, yet least effective leader, to level 5 which is the most effective. It isn’t until level 5 leadership where a leader really stands out.

These are the rarest group of leaders. Level 5 leaders build lasting greatness. They tend to blame mistakes on themselves when something goes wrong, and value others when things go well. These leaders have no ego and put their company before their selves. I can relate the idea of five level leadership to the leaders I have grown up with in my life. They mostly consist of players and coaches on sports teams. I played football my whole life and throughout high school. I had witnessed the culture of our program change from when I joined the team as a freshman, to the last game of my senior year. Throughout the years I played, I was able to identify the type of leadership that went on.

Because of the leadership, the program went from being one of the best to one of the worst.

On this team I was able to identify level 1 to level 4 leadership. The level 1 leaders were the players who sat on the bench, but helped make practice effective. Theses players used their little amount of skills to contribute to the team. The level 2 leaders consisted of the players who started on the team and played the most. These players used their capabilities to achieve goals for the team. They were the ones out on the field winning the games. The level 3 leaders where some of the players who labeled themselves as “captains”.

The captains led the stretching lines and spoke at team meetings, but some of them weren’t respected by other players. Captains who were respected and had players believe in them were the level 4 leaders. They were helping the team build a culture to become better. Their teammates wanted to play for them. Level 5 leadership was attempted but failed by the Athletic Director of the school.

This mistake inevitably caused the program to nosedive.

Our head football coach became Athletic Director when I was a junior in high school and put us in a harder division. Our team was playing harder teams and each year we kept losing talent. This caused the team to lose more games and less students wanted to play. Players started to not show up at practice and because we were a small school, it didn’t look good with the program. I would consider our coach as a level 4 leader because he cared about the football program and wanted it to be a great one.

He made people believe that he can make the program strong, but his ego took over, and his self–interest of wanting the program to be more than what it was caused it to fail. If he was a level 5 leader he would have put the program back into the weaker division, but his ego got the best of him. He was unable to take the blame for the mistake and do what’s right for the team.

I believe that if our coach drops his ego and turns the program around, he can potentially become a level 5 leader. He is an alumni of the high school and grew up in the town. He cares about the team and its reputation because he has been coaching for over 15 years.

Level 5 leaders are usually found within the organization and that is where he comes from. This will be difficult to achieve though because there is less talent on the team and the amount of players are diminishing.

I’m laying down in bed right now. I can’t see a light besides what is being displayed on my phone screen. It’s the darkness that has steadily reaped havoc inside me the past 3-4 months. This darkness can be crippling. It’s darkness that is there until you turn the light on, but sometimes the light seems so far away. And when you do turn it on, it only stays for brief moments.

For over the past year and a half, I have pursued Wish Dish head on. Head down, foot on the gas, with small moments of pause and reset along the way. The burnouts have been bad, over-exacerbated at times. They hit you when you least expect them. Jabs, hooks, and knockout punches coming from nowhere. People who once believed in you walking away not paying attention to you anymore. People you look up to telling you the fight may be over.

You step in the ring to begin with because you have something to fight for. If you step in the ring to look tough and be cool, then it’s all for the wrong reasons. It’s not a battle worth to endure without a noble cause to follow. There’s no way I could push each day if I didn’t know Why I started.

I stepped in the ring because I had a problem.

I hit a low point, and I needed a place to share. I needed a place to connect and find a tribe of my own. My problem became a dream, not just for myself, but a dream that could help others around me.

So I created a solution (Wish Dish) that has allowed me to do just that, but I’ve also created a solution that has thrown me in the middle of sea trying to figure out the next best place to swim. Usually, there’s always that person that puts on the tubies before I “drown” and provides reassurance I’m on the right path.

But the past 3 or 4 months, the anchor has been pulling hard on the feet. There has been no reassurance. There hasn’t been that person.

When I say I’ve failed, I’ve failed a lot. When I first started, when the gas was on Full, and I was running at Ferrari speeds of excitement, I could do anything. It was all about the people we were serving. From showing up to Georgia State meeting 300 random students in 4 days, to flying to Mailbu to speak to Pepperdine students, to showing up to UCLA for a day talking to 50 strangers, to building ambassador programs at 5 different colleges in Georgia, we were doing it all.  Anything we wanted at lightning speed.

I learned early on that wasn’t the most efficient way to scale content, so I stumbled upon a woman who had this amazing idea to look at our data. From there, I saw mental health, sports, culture, and faith were our top 4 topics. From there, I developed relationships within those areas and grew our content with the help of many people fighting for the same cause. Within the span of 3 months, we launched a new site (the one we have today), published more than 175 stories, and had an event with almost 200+ people. An event where people flew in from Philadelphia, Tennessee, Virginia, and New York.

The tide was high, we were riding the wave. But all waves come to a crash and this wave seemed to take me through the undercurrent.

I just haven’t fully realized it until now.

In May, I lost an incredible team member Sam Dickinson to a full time job in Indiana. Sam was a backbone to the early foundation. He helped build our content strategy, power points, review our proposals. He was the most reliable person who understood everything we were doing.

When Sam left, I knew it was time to find a cofounder, so I heavily recruited a friend from Philadelphia who has the I can do anything attitude. I thought he’d be perfect for the team. And I still hope he can one day join. After not being able to come to terms, it was another blow to the chest. It seemed early on, anyone and everyone was helping push this vision forward. I never had rejection up to this point from someone I had worked so hard to try and recruit.

Speaking about building the team, for the last 6 months, I’ve pushed relentlessly to find a technical founder who can make product changes and improve the website. In April I had conducted 25 user interviews and learn how important it was to build a product that keeps visitors and contributors coming back to the site. So I began the search for a long-term technical solution. Being extremely short on capital and in an industry where tech developers are swept up by the tech giants of the world for $75K/year — I’ve struggled immensely to find the consistent talent I need. I’ve probably put in 100+ hours of work trying to find the right person interviewing one tech person after another and having introductions made. Heck, I even have a spreadsheet of 80 different names I’ve talked too.

Along with trying to put a team in place, we’ve been working to implement revenue models. I’ve struggled to put In monetary solutions with the rawness of the platform. How do we make money but not ruin an authentic brand. We have begun the foundation for a book called “Showing Up Naked” but that is a process in itself. Sponsors have been tough to come by and there are moments in time when the next best step forward is murky.

At 23, I’ve learned so much. I’ve given everything possible to this platform to make it succeed on extremely little capital.  The gas tank right now is near empty, and I’m trying to figure out if it’s worth a refuel. And if it is, I’m trying to figure out where the gas would be.

In the past year we have helped so many people get jobs from their stories shared, we’ve connected people with suicide stories to one another, and we’ve built meaningful connection for so many people.

It’s been everything I could imagine and more.

As the founder behind it, it’s hard to sometimes see through the fuzziness of the clouds. Day in and day out, I question, am I on the right path? I feel trapped in the college town I went to school in, sharing a room with a friend, driving a beat up 2004 car. It all seems rough from the outside, and on the inside I’m the one who can actually feel it.

As I reflect, we still have accomplished so much. I realize we wouldn’t be here without an amazing team of advisors, group of friends who have supported, and amazing teammates along the way.

So the question is, are we going to continue?

I watched the Olympics this weekend. I saw people who had trained a lifetime of to make their dreams come true. One of the divers who fell short said, “I’ll be back in Toyko.” He didn’t have to think twice about putting in another 4 years of training. The sheer resilience, determination, and effort was inspiring to see.

I recently read a book on Phil Knight, Nike’s Founder called Shoe Dog. Nike wasn’t even called Nike until year 8 of business. There were a million and one reasons why Nike should have failed in their first 25 years of business, but they found a way through.  Nike’s brand speaks for itself, because they have a founder who embodies every characteristic of what they represent.

For us, putting in a year and a half and letting it go because everything isn’t working how I thought by this time would simply be giving up. And I’m simply not ready to let that happen. Onward we go.

Bryan Wish

As we continue to work through connecting people in meaningful ways, we have taken our first step in forming community groups.

Communities to join: Please click and ask to be added as a member. We are looking for Community Managers as well.

Sports (for current Student-Athletes & Former Student-Athletes) to connect through sharing personal stories & professional opportunities

International (to connect people across the world through the sharing of stories)

Health (to connect people dealing with mental health, cancer, and other physical, mental, emotional troubles)

A few more to come in the near future …

There have been many times in my life where there was good and bad leadership.

Whether it was in a classroom or playing sports, leadership played a big role in my life. I was able to watch the leaders throughout my life and learn from their good ideas and bad mistakes. According to Jim Collins, in his book GOOD TO GREAT, there are five different levels of leadership. The leadership is ranked from level 1, being the most common, yet least effective leader, to level 5 which is the most effective. It isn’t until level 5 leadership where a leader really stands out. These are the rarest group of leaders. Level 5 leaders build lasting greatness.

They tend to blame mistakes on themselves when something goes wrong, and value others when things go well. These leaders have no ego and put their company before their selves. I can relate the idea of five level leadership to the leaders I have grown up with in my life. The leaders in my personal life mostly consist of players and coaches on the sports teams that I have be on. I played football my whole life and throughout my high school years. I had witnessed the culture of our program change from when I joined the team as a freshman, to the last game of my senior year.

Throughout the years I played, I was able to identify the type of leadership that went on.

Because of the leadership, the program went from being one of the best to one of the worst. On this team I was able to identify level 1 to level 4 leadership. The level 1 leaders were the players who sat on the bench, but helped make practice effective. Theses players used their little amount of skills to contribute to the team. The level 2 leaders consisted of the players who started on the team and played the most. These players used their capabilities to achieve goals for the team, such as winning games. They were the ones out on the field winning the games.

The level 3 leaders where some of the players who labeled themselves as “captain”. The captains led the stretching lines and spoke at team meetings, but some of them weren’t respected by other players. Our captains that were respected and had players believe in them were the level 4 leaders. These captains were helping the team build a culture and become better. Their teammates wanted to play for them. Level 5 leadership was attempted but failed by the Athletic Director of the school.

This mistake inevitably caused the program to nosedive.

Our head football coach became Athletic Director when I was a junior in high school and put us in a harder division. Our team was playing harder teams and each year we kept losing talent. This caused the team to lose more games and less students wanted to play. Players started to not show up at practice and because we were a small school, this was a bad sign.

I would consider our coach as a level 4 leader because he cared about the football program and wanted it to be a great one. He made people believe that he can make the program strong, but his ego took over, and his self –interest of wanting the program to be more than what it was caused it to fail. If he was a level 5 leader he would have put the program back into the weaker division, but his ego got the best of him.

He was unable to take the blame for the mistake and do what’s right for the team.

I believe that if our coach drops his ego and turns the program around, he can potentially become a level 5 leader. He is an alumni of the high school and grew up in the town.

He cares about the team and its reputation because he has been coaching for over 15 years. Level 5 leaders are usually found within the organization and that is where he comes from. This will be difficult to achieve though because there is less talent on the team and the amount of players are diminishing.

The leadership of upper level management is a key factor of what drives success in a company.  Without proper leadership, sustained success is unattainable. 

Each individual’s definition of leadership is going to be different.  In “Good to Great” by Jim Collins, he introduces this concept called Level 5 Leadership.  A level 5 leader is an individual who takes a company from good, and creates great sustained success for future generations.  According to Collins, level 5 leaders “build enduring greatness through a paradoxical blend of personal humility and professional will” (Collins, 20). These leaders put their personal desires and egos aside and focus all of their ambition towards making the company great.  While focusing on the success of the company, these leaders never seek praise, and often discuss the companies’ success using words such as “we” instead of “I”, as to hide from the spotlight and credit the success towards others.

The immense humility these leaders possess creates an environment filled with positive morale which leads to success. To completely grasp this concept, one must understand that personal humility is only half of the paradoxical blend, which forms a level 5 leader. While being modest and humble, these leaders will do whatever is needed for the success of the company. According to Collins, “Level 5 leaders are fanatically driven, infected with an incurable need to produce results” (Collins, 30).  The work ethic these leaders contain aids them in their success. They desire long-term success and will settle for nothing but that, no matter the difficulty of the task at hand. The determination to set up the company for greater success once they have left, while knowing they may receive no credit or praise is what separates this elite group from others.

The comprehensive mixture of personal humility and this professional will for greatness is what makes level 5 leaders rare and prestigious.

The determination for success in future generations is what makes a level 5 leader so valuable. This past year I had the opportunity to experience working in one of America’s top 100 companies to work for. After learning this concept, I can see clearly why the company is extremely successful and then extremely unsuccessful.

Upon hiring, our general manager displayed the many qualities of a level 5 leader. Through daily team meetings to individual monthly evaluations and awards, he strove to praise his hard working employees. He was always extremely humble and thankful for the dedication of his employees for making the company succeed.  He would work endless hours in any position needed to ensure that the company was going to be successful.  He truly cared about the success of the company before his own personal goals.

Towards the end of the summer, we had received notice that he was going to be leaving the company.  In a short two weeks, he had promoted an assistant to the new general and they began to run the company. Within the upcoming months, the daily meetings stopped and we no longer received help from upper management. Employees were no longer being praised for their hard work, yet reprimanded for each and every mistake. Workplace morale had completely taken a 180-degree turn and was at an all time low.

As morale declined, employees began to leave the company, forcing others to work longer hours, without any thanks or praise.

Instead of daily meetings to praise and motivate, we were being told of the losses the company was taking and being blamed for not generating enough sales. Within a six month span, the entire company was different. No longer was it yielding successful results. This really shows how rare level 5 leaders are.

 Even though the previous general manager showed many of the qualities of a level 5 leaders, the failure to select a quality successor proves that he is not a level 5 leader. Instead of spending the time to select a quality general manager, he simply hired the next man in command, which ended up being disastrous.

Within today’s world, business is extremely difficult.

It seems as if we have created most anything and it is becoming increasingly more difficult for people to stand-out in our society. However, author Seth Godin poses that in today’s world, we have an extremely rare opportunity: to bring people together. In his work Tribes, Godin suggests that people are ultimately looking to connect with others who have similar beliefs, interests, and experiences and make lasting connections. I witnessed this phenomenon personally, although I did not realize it at the time.

During high school, I embarked upon an extremely difficult goal. At the same time that I was seeking a Division I golf scholarship and was enrolled in the most challenging high school in the Midwest, I decided to take a school project to an entirely new level. This was when my company Fashion With a Passion was born.

As a part of my high-school curriculum, I was required to create my own project that combined the elements of Creativity, Action, and Service.

Being the over-achiever that I am, I wanted to not only make my school proud of my project, but also find a way to give-back to the community that supported me in every way. This was when I allowed my creative juices to flow. I ultimately decided to start my own handbag company that combined my love for fashion, passion for life, and motivation to make a difference in the community. With the mentoring of my cousin who was a fellow handbag designer, I designed, marketed, and brought my signature “TLC Bag” to the local spotlight.

My company was centered around the Donate Life campaign. As I am the daughter of an organ recipient and the niece of an organ donor, I wanted to give-back to the community that gave my dad the gift of vision. Not only did I strive to raise money for the foundation, but I also sought to increase the amount of donors in my community and change the negative stigma of organ donation. Through my hard work, I quickly attracted attention and was featured in various local magazines, newsletters, radio shows, and even made a TV appearance. After my appearances in the local media, the project immediately took-off and I sold-out of my entire inventory within a week. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I wasn’t selling purses; I was assembling a tribe.

According to Godin, humans long to connect to one another and form “tribes,” which was what happened during my project.

Looking back, my supporters weren’t looking to buy a purse, but were instead looking to connect with other people whose lives had been affected by organ donation and join a movement bigger than themselves. As a part of Fashion With a Passion, I made it a point to let others share their stories with me on the phone and on my website, allowing for a support network to form within my company. This was the true core of my business because it allowed everyone to share their stories and it showed everyone that they are a part of a greater community. Although this tribe was bonded by tragedy, it was strong nonetheless.

Although I reached my fundraising goals, I eventually concluded the project with a much bigger impact than I had ever anticipated. Not only did this experience teach me how to run a company, it also allowed me and others to connect with a greater community whose lives had been touched by organ donation. Through hearing the stories of others and sharing my own, I gained a stronger appreciation for life and eventually went-on to achieve all of my goals both inside and outside of the company. Perhaps the biggest lesson that I learned through this project is that tribes can assemble anywhere, out of both the greatest miracles and through the worst tragedies.

All a tribe needs is one person who is willing to assemble them, and together, they are unstoppable.