“Just wait for Trudy. Believe in Trudy. Trudy will come.”
When I began watching the television series Monk, I didn’t expect to get anything out of it aside for a good way to waste some (maybe a lot) of my downtime over the summer. What I didn’t know, however, is that in watching the show I would put together one of life’s most valuable lessons.
In this particular scene of the episode, Monk, the main character, is given the task of giving a teenage girl, Julie, some assistance in her boy troubles. There are a lot of awkward situations and the talk is going nowhere at first. However, it takes a turn for the better and some progress is made. The girl asks Monk how he knew it was “right” when he met his wife Trudy, to which he responds with a couple of reasons and this comforting statement: “All your dreams will come true. But they don’t have to come true this weekend, right? You can take your time; you can wait.” Just wait for Trudy. Believe in Trudy. Trudy will come.”
When I first heard this quote I really didn’t think anything of it. Only after a few minutes of pondering on it did the message really soak in. Like in the scenario portrayed by the show, relationship problems are often a hot topic when it comes to rushing into things and waiting. But realistically, you can replace “Trudy” with almost anything in life.
Most people don’t necessarily like waiting for anything, whether it’s for a job opportunity, a relationship that will last, or something as simple as a new car. Why should you have to wait for something when it can happen right now? Well, that’s precisely the lesson. Oftentimes when someone rushes into a particular situation it is done so from the hip and without discerning everything (possible results and problems).
This isn’t to say that every time something happens so quickly something wrong will occur, but anything that is undertaken without the proper knowledge assuredly has a larger chance of having damaging outcomes. This is exactly why Monk references why dreams don’t need to come true in a weekend.
Nothing has to be rushed because there is always time to think things over so that the right decision can be made. I’ll be one to admit that it has been an on and off battle to breakthrough into the profession that I hope to one day be a part of. I have spent copious amounts of time trying to develop contacts and get my foot in the door with an organization because I know that getting involved early is better than trying to attack it later.
Sometimes it even gets me down. But one thing I always forget is that I’m only going to be a junior in college and that I still have a couple of years before I become a part of America’s working class. I, along with others that are struggling with this, just have to remember that my time hasn’t come yet and that I will be presented with an opportunity when the time is right. So the next time you notice yourself jumping into a situation without much thought, just wait for Trudy because she will come.
“Sometimes the fastest way isn’t always the best way. Sometimes the best things in life take a while.” –Emily Beth
As I write this piece, I am on a plane coming back from Iceland. I am the most sleep deprived I’ve ever been, I am wearing the same clothes I flew to Iceland in and I am pretty sure I am getting sick but my goodness…it was the best trip of my entire life.
Let’s take a step back to find out how I ended up in Iceland. In January of 2016, I was sitting at a restaurant in New York City at 2 in the morning with my friends Pooja and Vance. Pooja mentioned she was going to Iceland in a few months and invited us both to come. We said we’d love to go but I wrote it off in my mind because I did not think I would actually go.
Fast forward 1 month later, Pooja let’s me know she booked her tickets and wanted to know if I was coming. At the beginning of the year I had promised myself I would no longer make excuses on why I could not not travel. I am 21 and need to take advantage of the lack of responsibility I have in my life. I will not be in this position forever and I need to take advantage of it. With that being said, I was left with 2 choices:
So how was Iceland? It was the most beautiful country I have ever visited. It was like something out of a movie. We drove all around the country and at one point there would be rocks and moss everywhere, the next minute we were right in the middle of a snow storm, drive a little farther and we were on top of rushing waterfalls, drive a little past that and we were having snow ball fights on glaciers. Words are useless, pictures give a glimpse of it’s beauty. The only thing I can say is GO TO ICELAND. Trust me…you won’t regret it.
Now, on to what I learned from my trip to Iceland:
Too often, when we try something new we go into that situation with preconceived judgments based off people we talk to or things we see. I had never been to Iceland before so when I did research I heard everything from it’s the best country in the world to I should never go visit.
Before I left, I promised myself I would have no expectations for the country based on other’s opinions. This allowed me to not be disappointed if it did not live up to my expectations. It’s one of the first times I’ve done this on a trip and it made the trip 10 times better because I was able to enjoy each new experience.
There is only 1 person in your life that can make your life incredible. That person is you. During the trip I posted photos and videos on Snapchat, Instagram and Facebook. I received numerous messages of people saying, “Your trip looks incredible!” “I wish I could do that!” “I want to have your life!” Guys let me be clear. I am not rich, I am not staying in 5-star hotels, and I am not booking these adventures through some crazy expensive travel agency (Although Pooja and Connie did plan an awesome trip and could easily start their own agency!)
You can have these adventures too. You just have to go out and do it. Traveling to an unknown country is a scary thing to do but the pros will always outweigh the cons (if you have the right attitude). The only person that can change your life is you so get off your ass and start making your epic adventures happen. The way I approach life now is, “What are the stories I want to tell my grandchildren?” I want to inspire them to see the world, meet as many people as possible and make the most of what the world has to offer. If I want them to live life that way then I need to live life the same way. That’s the legacy I want to leave.
Many people know this but I broke up with my girlfriend of 5 year’s in January of 2016. It has been the most difficult thing I have ever gone through. We’ve been broken up for almost 3 months and have not spoken once. I could sit here and say that I am doing fine but that would be a lie. I’ve coped in extremely unhealthy ways, I’ve had countless sleepless nights and I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster that does not seem to end.
In fact, the week leading up to Iceland might have been one of the hardest weeks yet. However, there is something about throwing snow balls at your friends on top of a glacier in Iceland that gets your mind off of your struggles.
Whether you’ve lost someone in your life, having trouble in your relationship, lost your job or suffering from depression, I urge you to plan a trip somewhere and break up the monotony that many people find themselves in on a daily basis. You don’t have to go away for weeks; I was only in Iceland for 5 days. I do believe it should be somewhere you haven’t been before and make sure you are doing physical activity while you are out there. It’s good for you mentally, emotionally and physically. Keep in mind, going away did not get rid of the pain. I still thought about the break up many times on my trip but it’s the most I’ve been able to get it off my mind in a long time.
4. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Not many people know this (other than my wonderful Mother) but I HATE trying new things and being away from home. Seriously, I hate it. When I find something I like, I sink my teeth into it and don’t try anything else. For example, I am terrified of ever moving out of Atlanta because I don’t want to start over (That will need to be another blog post). From a young age, I did not try new foods, I hated traveling and I hated being away from home for long periods of time.
However, the other side to my personality is that I am obsessed with facing and overcoming challenges. At age 16, I challenged myself to go to Beijing, China on a 2 week trip in order to push myself out of my comfort zone and experience the world. This was the catalyst for the mindset of getting comfortable with being uncomfortable. Was Iceland hard to be in? No way.
The people I stayed with are incredible, the Airbnb was gorgeous and the country is breathtaking. Regardless, I am a little baby inside and will always miss home. Even as I type this, I am headed to Boston for the evening to hang out with my friend and then I spend 3 days in Indiana celebrating my friend’s 21st birthday. What I want to do is take a direct flight to Atlanta and sleep for 36 hours but that would be doing what is comfortable. EVERY single time I do something uncomfortable; incredible, life changing experiences come out of it. Is this a coincidence? I think not. You get out of life what you put into it. Start putting some uncomfortable sauce into yours.
Lastly, I’d like to thank the wonderful people I went on this trip with:
Finally, my 3 questions to whoever is reading this is simple:
1. When is your next trip?
2. Where is your next trip?
3. Why haven’t you booked it?