It has been almost a year since I last posted an article on Wish Dish and there’s been a bit of change since then. If you haven’t had a chance to read my first article please do so before continuing with this one. You can find it here: http://thewishdish.com/she-did-it-her-way/

In life, some people are where they are at by mere chance. They leave it up to others to decide their fate. They lack true direction or desire. They avoid making a decision for fear of making the wrong decision, so they make no decision. They wait for things to come to them instead of going after them, especially when their vision is unclear or unknown.

I know this because I was that person 6 months following my first article in December 2015. I was (and still am to some extent which I’ll explain later) an independent consultant who traveled the globe delivering sales, leadership development and employee engagement training to large organizations. I made good money, earned miles every time I flew that has allowed me to travel to other countries for less than $150 for a found trip ticket and did I mention that I enjoyed doing the work I did? In the midst of all this I noticed something. I was comfortable.

In addition to independent consulting I had this side project or maybe you could call it a hobby, I hosted a podcast called She Did It Her Way that was gaining traction but not growing. In my head at the time I thought, “But that’s okay,” because at the time I wasn’t truly focused on it. It was until the past three months that it has become my full time focus.

The first six months of this year I convinced myself that I could grow my consulting practice and She Did It Her Way at the same time.

Wrong.

I had to chose.

Because where your focus goes, your energy flows and results show.

This is where it got tough but to be completely honest, I made it more tough than it needed to be. Had I listened to my gut sooner I would have made this decision at the beginning of the year versus waiting so long.

Why did I wait?

Because I didn’t want to chose. I wanted both worlds: successful consulting company and a full functioning podcast (that would eventually turn into a full on brand).

I had one foot on the dock and one foot on the boat. Sooner or later I would fall into the water, not stabilizing my two feet on any ground. It was like the time when I was at Target and I kept going back and forth if I was leaving or not. It wasn’t until I made the decision to leave that opportunities started showing up.

It wasn’t until I decided to put all my effort into She Did It Her Way that things started happening. In the past few months alone I’ve gotten closer to the brand, the business and more importantly, the listeners.

You can’t work on your business until you know your business. And you can’t know your business without being in your business.

Do I still take on consulting projects, you betcha! As every entrepreneur knows there will be days, weeks, months even years where in the beginning, your business won’t bring in revenue to sustain your personal need of income so you go out and work other jobs to support you. Needless to say the days I’m working a project are a bit longer because I still put time in for She Did It Her Way.

You don’t sign up for entrepreneurship because you want to work from home, think it’s an attractive title or because you think it would be fun or even better because you’ll be wealthy.

You chose entrepreneurship for the love of the journey.

You chose entrepreneurship because you love solving problems. You chose entrepreneurship because you believe in something so much you’re willing to devote all your time and energy to it for long periods of time when you feel nothing is happening but you keep telling yourself by faith that there indeed is something happening, maybe yet unseen.

Everything I just shared and especially the last few paragraphs is what I continually tell myself on a daily basis.

Everything in life is a choice. Your attitude. Your life’s work. Your spouse. Your friends. Everything.

Don’t leave it up to chance. Chose.

I didn’t believe my 14 year old self when a physician told me I was to be reliant on a mobility scooter or wheelchair by 25. I laughed and played it off reassuring myself I was different than the rest.

My FSH muscular dystrophy progression wasn’t as noticeable; I could still run and play competitive sports surely my physical state wouldn’t succumb to that. Many nights were spent balling my eyes out scared of being defined by an assistive device. I refused to accept reality blind to what all the research said. Why was I so afraid of wheels as legs? I would become another statistic, another check off the researcher’s list, another burden to the able-bodied. Something about being labeled “disabled” or “handicapped” all of which my core defied pierced my thoughts.

The best decision my 22 year old self made was to face this ugly monster of a mental obstacle and purchase a 3 wheeled, red, shiny scooter. The last 9 months have been the antithesis of everything I expected. I am alive, inspired, and ebullient. My scooter takes me places I would have never considered in a million years.

No longer do I count steps, look for places to sit and rest, worry about keeping up with friends, or tripping and falling; I am no longer afraid of living life.

There are tons of perks with wheels: people holding doors open for you, front row seats, free parking and in general people lending a hand. However, not to say getting wheels has been all kittens and rainbows. Scooters require regular maintenance and parts break or loosen from regular wear and tear. It’s a machine, and machines break. Downtime can be weeks or months depending on the part. Being 100% reliant on electronics for mobility is scary when insurance is not able to supply a backup and this is the reality of the situation.

Now that they see me rollin (not hatin’), I’m even more cognizant of uneven surfaces, curb cuts, ramps, elevators and overall ADA accessibility. My scooter takes a hard beating in the city of Atlanta, so I dedicate my free time to advocate for change. The way I advocate is by wandering around the city, taking pictures/videos of areas that need improvement and submitting claims through the Department of Public Works.

The 2010 ADA Standards for Accessible Design notates that there must be an accessible path of travel. We are at a pivotal point in architectural history were we are required to start designing for wheels first. If we design for wheels first, we are saying yes to inclusion. If we design for wheels first, we believe in equality.

If we design for wheels first, we are saying yes to equal access.

Another way I advocate for disability awareness is by taking on outdoor physical adventures. The last 2 years my family coined the term “Piggybacks for a Cure”. My brother and sister have carried me piggyback through two Reebok Spartan Sprints and raised awareness through NBC’s American Ninja Warrior. Our next piggyback adventure in October is partnered with Vestigo where we will conquer Georgia’s 78 mile section of the Appalachian Trail.

My belief is to show the world that regardless of your physical condition, you don’t just give up on life rather you look for outlets to inspire action and lobby for change.

Read Carden’s first story called Equal Access here!

People often ask – either with a curious or perplexed expression – “What made you want to start the nonprofit?” I smile and say something to the effect of, “A lifetime of screwing up.”

Be About Change (the nonprofit) provides higher education scholarships to students from low-income households, and we write about individuals and organizations that embrace change and seek to make a difference in the lives of others.

Lately, when interacting with people, whether I just met them or have known them for a while, I ask myself two questions: Is there anything I can do personally to help further their goals? Who in my network of people might be able to help them?

But things were not always this way.

The questions I used to ask were usually quite the opposite and I spent a lot of time figuring out ways to avoid dealing with internal conflict, or at the very, least suppressing it (only to realize that this in fact compounded things). Social media? I thought that was a platform for complaining and posting versions of my ideal self, as projected by my ego. As it turns out, the ego can be useful, but I’ve found its energy is wasted on creating facades.

Ironically – and I’ve never actually said this before – the nonprofit functions in a similar way. It’s an alter ego of sorts, and when I compartmentalize what I believe are positive efforts, I seem to be able to hold myself to a higher standard within the confines or premise of the nonprofit. In a way, it gives me a place to practice BEING my ideal self. Not the aesthetic kind – but the kind that is rooted in the foundational principles with which I was instilled when I was growing up.

Not so long ago, I made decisions from a very self-serving place; this of course compelled me to act in corresponding ways – addictions, self-isolation, no consideration of others, permanent judgment of others, and essentially no value for the lives of others or my own.

Things got so bad I knew I either had to change or I would lose everything…including my life.

Even still, almost a year into sobriety, my darkness seemed to have a stronghold on me…and I knew, yet again, it was time for change. In a way, I felt cheated…where was the reward for voluntary sobriety? Wasn’t life supposed to be much better now? 2015…dead sober…and it was one of the most difficult times in my life…because for the first time in my life, I knew I had to travel to the deepest, darkest corners of my mind if I was to find peace.

I signed up, trained for, and ran my first half-marathon.

I spent a lot of time identifying behavioral patterns in my life and learning how my mind works. I habitually sought out new experiences and scenarios that made me uncomfortable. I got used to immersing myself in my fears. My running training was often at 4:30 and 5:00 a.m., with no sunlight. There was something liberating about conquering physical challenges in darkness.

After the run, hitting other personal records, and practicing writing more honestly, it dawned on me that I could actually harness the madness…the unsettled nature of my mind, and channel it to do something productive, while trying to help others. I use the word “trying” because there is an inherent sense of arrogance in saying “I help others.” It’s presumptuous to assume you know what is best for someone else. Rather, I try to configure and reconfigure my motivation to be conscious of where others are in life, understanding that all of us generally operate from a place where we feel mentally safe.

So…this is the longer answer to the question “What made you want to start the nonprofit?”

I can’t honestly say I wanted to…it was never some life-long goal of mine. I guess you could say I became a person that was no longer solely motivated by service to self. I became aware that the smallest effort we make TODAY can have a positive impact on a person…generations later, after that spark ignites action in others throughout time.

As I conclude this article, a song starts playing on my Spotify playlist that I used to hear when I wanted to make changes in my life, but couldn’t. When fear of the unknown was paralyzing. But don’t take my word for it.

Imagine your fears and the stronghold they have on you. Thank them for bringing you this far (gratitude for them is important, in my opinion). Then allow that energy to propel you into a state of continuously being about change. Thank you for letting me share my #halfthestory.

This past December, young leaders came together in the legendary land of possibility, New York City. AIESEC’s Youth Action Summit summoned the youth world and the business world to the United Nations Headquarters for a three day summit which aims to discuss and create an agenda which will define youth implementation of the UN Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs).

As the first day of the summit came to a close, we wanted to highlight four signs that we noticed which indicate that young people are absolutely ready and able to change our world.

Young people are the present, and the future. Here’s why.

1. THERE’S POWER IN OUR NUMBERS

80 million people classify as what we define as “millennial” (born between 1985-1993). This is the largest generation of any in the world. 50% of the world’s population in 2015 is under the age of 30. Statistically speaking, we make up a disproportionately large portion of the global ecosystem. Young people want their opinions and insights to count for something, and we’ve got the numbers to back us up.

2. WE ARE CONSISTENTLY DEMONSTRATING OUR INFLUENCE

Youth movements are not uncommon. Across the world, young people have shown that they have the ability to make serious changes by using their voices. With the rise of young leaders such as Malala Yousafzai in Pakistan and Joshua Wong in Hong Kong, we have proven that we have the power to make a political difference. Additionally, young people are incredibly active in the digital world, with the rise of YouTube, Instagram, and Vine stars creating a new category of youth leadership: influencer. The digital ecosystem has changed the way youth leaders rise and communicate, leading me to the next point.

3. WE ARE DIGITAL NATIVES

In our increasingly digital age, young people have not only a technological advantage, but a technological lifestyle. We are digital natives – meaning that we have been raised in a world of tweets, Facebook posts, computers, and iPods. Unlike those before us, who are the new “digital immigrants,” tech is unparalleled in our hands, because we are able to easily adapt to and learn new systems. As I mentioned, the power of social platforms is showcased daily by young people. Whether a crowdfunding page for someone’s volunteer project, a tweet which is retweeted by millions, an online petition signed by thousands which leads to political change, or a YouTube video viewed by over 20 million people, young people now have the ability to communicate in mass, globally. And we do.

4. CHANGE AND INNOVATION ARE IN OUR NATURE

As young people, we are often faced with tremendous emotional and social pressure. Whether we are coming of age in a diverse university or college or growing up without the opportunity of higher education, we become incredibly in touch with humanity. We are at the peak of uncomfortable adjustment, and it gives us an incredibly unique perspective. We are not afraid of change. We live change daily. Nothing is certain for us, and that allows us to imagine and ideate things which people who have been settled in routine for years cannot see. We are known for a desire to switch jobs frequently, and for a need to feel that our values connect to our work. For this reason, we are passionate and innovative in a way that no other generation can match.

Do you believe that youth leaders are going to be the ones who shape the world? We do.

UGA Miracle is the biggest philanthropy on campus. There are thousands of members and the goals we set each year are outrageous. This year, we raised over $1 million dollars for Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta. That is amazing.

Raising that much money is something I never thought I would be a part of, especially as a first year student. I will forever be impressed by what a group of students can achieve when they really want to. All of this is just factual. The thing that gets to me is the dedication and inspiration you can sense in every member of the Executive Board. Everything for Miracle is big.

In UGA Miracle, the goals are huge, the meetings are loud, the reveals are magical.

At the beginning of the year, the goals reveal seemed like such a simple thing. Everyone gathers in a big room and the leaders announce how much money we aim to raise for the year. The reveal is something that gets put on a to-do list – something you go to because you feel obligated. When you get there though, everything changes.

A family comes in to talk to you, to connect you to what you are raising money for. Then the tears come. Some of the kindest people go through the most difficult things and that is tough to handle, even when you are not the one experiencing it. These families are inspirational beyond belief.

After the family shared, one of the Family Relations committee chairs spoke. She detailed her time with the Hopkins family and part of her message was “I am me because you are you”. This got to me. I think we see reflections of this statement in our daily lives and we just let them slip.

We are shaped and molded by those we spend time with.

It is obvious that my best friends throughout the years have made me who I am, but it is easy to forget. We forget that moments and concrete memories would have been completely different with other people.

Other times, we get angry and upset, and then we really forget. In the midst of heartbreak, we would much rather foster on the negative things that came with the pain rather than the light and the joy we had the chance to have for so long. Sometimes you go through a pain that is unlike anything you have experienced before. This is when you learn. You learn how to heal.

Sometimes the hardest things are what make you who you are. Sometimes the people that seem to cause the most damage actually teach you about yourself. I am me because you are you.

So my question for you is do you know what you want to do for the rest of your life?

You do you say? Well, really… Are you sure that even 20 or even 1 year down the line you will still call that your dream job? You see, I am dubious of anyone who says they have their entire life figured out. Not because there aren’t people with genuine passions and skills, but simply because people are dynamic.

People change.

And their goals and dreams change with them. I don’t know about you, but I constantly change my mind and have doubts about whether the route I am currently pursuing is the right one for me. To be honest, I don’t know if I have ever been completely sure of my life path.

Here’s an excerpt from junior year of high school to prove my point: “How is anyone supposed to really know what they want to do? There are literally millions of opportunities out there, thousands of colleges, hundreds of majors, and one of me. Sure, there are the things I’m good at, pretty much just school, and the things I sort of like, chorus and softball, but how are you just supposed to know at what you will succeed?

“What if I put in the hard time to become a doctor and find out I’m squeamish or go through dental school to discover I hate teeth? What if I just haven’t been exposed to my true passion? Lately, people have asked me where I want to go, but is that really the question?”

It’s funny to me a little bit because I’m sure to outsiders it looks like I have my entire life figured out. I’m in college, picked a major, and I even have work experience and research under my belt. From my perspective, though, I feel as if I am blindly trucking on, following a slight inclination for which I am not entirely sure about.

I call it a quarter-life crisis, and if you haven’t had one, I’m sure you will.

It may not even be school-related. Maybe you are with a guy you have been dating for years, but just aren’t sure if he’s the one, or you have the opportunity to take a job or internship in a new city but can’t decide whether to stay or go. These are the times when it really is tough because we are literally making decisions that alter the entirety of our one life we have been given.

Now I haven’t entirely figured out what to do in these situations either, but I will tell you that the only thing that keeps me sane is knowing that I have the power to change my mind. I have the power to quit a job if I want to, to pick up and start anew elsewhere, to even go back to school and change my major or get a new degree if that is something that I need to do.

In the moment you start to see yourself as stagnant or stuck on this pathway of life, things start to get scary. However, there is ALWAYS the opportunity to find a new passion and rediscover yourself.

Having that internal locus of control, that attitude that it is you who makes decisions about where you are going with your life and not just random chance and circumstances, will get you far. Yes, there are limitations like money and time and relationships, and those are definitely factors, but that still doesn’t mean you don’t have the ability to make a change on the pathway of life.

You can backtrack, change directions, or be truly brave and have your own path. I know it sounds a bit cliche, and to be honest, it is. But that is the reality of it as well.

I want to change the world. It is not a dream or vision but a reality that I am able to change the world for the better. I figured this out while visiting New York, New York. For my 16th birthday present, my parents took me and my best friend sightseeing for the weekend.

The night before we left to go home, we visited Ray’s Pizza, which had been personally recommended to me. This was, in fact, one of the primary reasons I wanted to visit, for the fabled New York style pizza.

The pizza was delicious, but I made my discovery while walking back to our hotel.

We had gotten three whole pizzas all topped with unique toppings for the four of us to split, and I was carrying the box with the few slices leftover. I was admittedly walking slower than normal because of the large amount of hot cheesy pizza, and so maybe that was what caused me to notice the homeless man half-asleep on the edge of the sidewalk.

Most people in New York City are so busy they don’t notice, or pretend not to notice, the large amount of unfortunate people without homes. I was planning on eating the pizza  I held in my hands for breakfast the next morning.

But seeing someone without anything while I had so much just did not seem right to me.

I was not compelled by guilt nor did I feel any responsibility for his condition, instead I acted on what was an obvious wrong that I could make right. He was hungry. I had food. Our conversation lasted no more than thirty seconds; the look of surprise and gratitude in his eyes stays with me to this day. On that day, I discovered just how easy it is to change a life.

The way the pizza had an effect on the man whom I had not met uncovered a dramatic revelation: I can change lives and by changing lives, I can change the world.

The price of the pizza was not the important part; however, the gesture of giving what I did not need was where I found the breakthrough. Because of my interaction in New York, I have found new discoveries that I want to dive into. I want to know why it is right for me to get an iPhone 6 for Christmas, while other people my age do not have a dinner on Christmas. I want to know why it is acceptable for me to have luxuries yet some do not have necessities.

I am not tackling world hunger or extreme poverty by giving away some pizza, but I do believe I can personally change the world for the better. I want to learn how I can drastically improve the lives of those who I interact with. It now seems like common sense when I tell people that I want to help people. Who doesn’t?

It is logical to dedicate your life to helping people, because the feeling you get from it cannot be expressed in words.

That is something that is best discovered on your own. Today, I give back by participating in Virginia Tech Relay For Life – which has raised over $5 million for cancer research and patient services. Join me today to make a difference in the lives of millions.

(Written by Rachel Ehlinger)

Did you ever once have that crazy idea in your head that maybe in possibly the slightest way imaginable could become an incredible venture that takes your life to the place you finally wish it to be?

Maybe you’re just bored sitting in class daydreaming, wondering if the idea in your head has been invented yet. Why let these dreams fade away when the bell rings? Why not make these ideas into realities? Well, that’s what I did.

I decided it was time for some change in my life. I was tired of being bored to death in class disregarding why x should equal z in this equation. Why does it matter that x equals z? Why does anything matter other than the fact that I want to get out of this cliche world and go on an adventure? Make a change. Do something different. Finally follow the path my mind so blatantly paves day after day.

So, I started a company.

A company with my very own idea. My very own mission. My very own goal. With me as my own boss and no one telling me to make sure x equals z or you fail.

It didn’t start out all as fairytales. The reality is, to follow an idea, you have to believe in it. You have to want your dream to succeed more than anything in the world. If you believe that, you will succeed.

What is the idea you ask? … A clothing line. But not just any clothing line. Something unique that no one else has. Something that gives back to the community to help create social change in our world. Something like Ekkos.

Founded in summer of 2015, Ekkos is now a legitimate clothing line that provides secondary education for orphans in Africa. With unique patterns and professional seamstresses that hand craft each product one by one, Ekkos has gone from an idea in my brain in the middle of calc class to a dream that has been more successful than I could have ever imagined.

I made a change in my life that so many young people are afraid to make. But I encourage you. All of you, to roll with the ideas in your head that you so often think of and make something of yourself that the 20 year old you would be proud of.

It doesn’t matter if x equals z. What matters is that your’re living the life you always dreamed of. Whether it be an adventurous one, or a cautious one. Do what makes you happy.

If you enjoyed this article, please take the time to visit Ekkos at ekkos.org and see how we are changing the world through a dream imagined in the middle of calc class.

Webiste: ekkos.org

Intsagram: @ekkosapparel

Twitter: @ekkosapparel

Facebook: Ekkos

(Written by Rebecca Rosen)

It’s January, that lovely time of year where it seems everyone you know and love (or maybe just know) is setting goals for themselves for the new year; do more, eat less, that sort of thing. There is an overwhelming pressure to somehow be better regardless of how bad or good you thought you were in the past year. I love New Years, don’t get me wrong but the pressure, the pressure is what kills it for me.

It’s a general convention that people do much of their growing during their years at university; college is the place where people really “discover themselves” and “find their purpose.”

But what about those of us who have found ourselves already? I am not the type of person who constantly tries to reinvent myself. In fact for a very long time I was a creature of habit and to stray from that habit would be the worst thing in the history of the universe, ever.

In high school I decided to leave my comfort zone, do things for me, develop interests outside of the ones I had figured would characterize me for the rest of eternity. I learned some very important things about myself along the way; music is my everything, coffee is my second everything and black trumps all other colors by far.

Jokes aside, I did some real self discovery in high school, especially over the course of my senior year, and to be candid I’m pretty happy with what I found. I learned what was and what wasn’t
important and have channeled much of my energy this year at university into putting the ideals I developed over my last year in high school into practice. Two years of too much people pleasing, too much worrying about how others perceived me and too little attention paid to what makes me happy made for one extremely unhappy high school junior.

I was constantly anxious, it seemed like there wasn’t a moment when I wasn’t worrying about something and I realized I cannot and will not live the rest of my life that way.

To live my life essentially in constant fear and unpleasantness is not to live at all, it was just existing.

Starting in twelfth grade I finally began to live my life for me. Hobbies I never took too seriously became passions of mine. I threw myself into the things and relationships that I cared about and allowed myself to be completely open and vulnerable for the first time in my life. I stopped caring about what other people had to say about me behind my back and started to prove them wrong through my actions, my words and my choices.

Living my life for me did not come easy and I had to learn that my happiness as a number one priority was more important than those few extra toxic people in my life that would have lingered otherwise. It took me a very long time to accept the following universal truths: a) people change b) things change c) no matter how much a and b frighten you, there is absolutely NOTHING you can do about them. I’m constantly evolving, growing and for lack of a better word changing and that’s ok.

Things I simply thought were important to keep in mind during my senior year are now principles I live by from day to day, the people in my life are ones that want me to be a part of theirs as much as I want them to be a part of mine, life is good.

So really what I’m getting at here is it’s okay to be okay with who you are or what you’ve been working at already. I’ve just started a new chapter in my life hundreds of miles away from the place I call home and I’m expected to set a “goal” for myself to “accomplish” over the next year? Yeah right. I’m just living life.