Growing up, similar to many teenage girls in today’s society, I found myself struggling with self-confidence.

I always found issues with my appearance; my grades were never good enough and I was always wishing to be someone else other than me. I constantly compared myself to “that girl” I thought I should be.

“That girl” had the perfect hair, “that girl” had the perfect body, “that girl” received a better grade on her test etc… It never occurred to me that I still received an A on the test, had a long head of hair down to my waist, or that I had a pretty average muscular type body.

I only saw flaws.

When I was in tenth grade, I felt like I needed to control something in my life.

Everything felt out of control and there was nothing I could do to better myself.

I will never forget the night after my dance recital in May, when I forced myself to vomit for the first time.

Why vomit?

I still ask myself this, and I still do not have an answer. It was something that just felt automatic.

Something that was secret. Something that I only knew about. It wasn’t that I was trying to “be skinny” or lose a few pounds. It was simply control.

However, being the type of intense person that I am, it quickly become an addiction. The first time turned into an excessive daily habit. In my “worst days”, I could vomit up to seven times a day.

Luckily, my mother knew the signs and was able to get me help as soon as possible. As much as I regretted her finding out, and feared that she would be mad, she was understanding, patient, and refused to let me sink.

The last thing I wanted was for her to be disappointed.

My mother made a few phone calls and enrolled me in an extensive daily rehab program three days later. After a summer full of intense Monday through Friday therapy, I finally felt human again.

I learned how to eat appropriate portions and the importance of overall life balance, and the friendships I made there still last to this day.

Therapy consisted of eating our daily meals there, which was more of a struggle than I thought it would be. Many individuals struggled during dinnertime and for the first few weeks we were not permitted to speak during the dinner hour.

I grew up where everyone shared their stories around the dinner table, so this was definitely an adjustment for me. The most profound part of therapy was the after dinner accountability program.

We had to turn in our food logs that we had kept for the day, and after “tweaking” my portions for the first three weeks, eventually I realized that I needed to be honest or I would never receive the help I needed.

That moment, I realized it was up to me to make the change, and for the first time I wanted to get better.

I looked around the room; many of the individuals were in their late 30s and 40s. They had families at home, and were stuck there all day.

I did not want that to be me. I began following the program specifically designed for me religiously, knowing they were the experts.

The individuals in my program held me accountable for my actions, which is a necessity when struggling with any type of addiction. I “graduated” from the program filled with hope, confidence, and I knew that there was no better me, than me.

I learned how every individual has their own identity, their own unique story… So, why try to be someone else, when there is no other you, than you?

You may wonder… how does my self-confidence and therapy play a role in my life today?

Currently, I am enrolled in the occupational therapy program at West Virginia University. However, for the past year I have been second-guessing my decision, and was never truly satisfied with the profession I chose.

I always wanted more. I had always dreamt of being a surgeon, but never thought I would ever be capable. I still never thought I was smart enough, the finances did not seem to line up, and the schooling seemed to be endless.

Anytime I pondered the question in my head, I had a million reasons to shut it down. Unlike in high school, where I resorted to hiding my fears, I took positive action.

Action that would lead me down an exciting journey! So, this past summer, I had a meeting with the head maxillofacial reconstruction surgeon at our local hospital and he changed my life.

He sat me down and told me that if being a surgeon was truly what I wanted to do, I would NEVER be satisfied with anything else. He flat out told me to stop “half-assing” my life choices, and to be brave enough to take chances.

He has continued to invest the time into me, and for that I am forever grateful. I have finally decided that I will be attending medical school when I graduate in order to pursue my dreams.

Although there have been some bumps along the way, no one can stop me from being the best me possible.

Ever since I was a child, my parents have always pushed me to become self-reliant and take advantage of any opportunities that came my way, no matter how huge or minuscule, with a smile.

From all of the things they taught me, something my dad said stuck with me; “If you don’t see a road ahead, start paving one yourself.” Sometimes in life, you will not be able to see the roads ahead of you. Sometimes, you will run into a dead end. But you can’t and should not stop because you are scared of what is to come or you are in a rough spot in your life.

The minute you give up, you not only give up on yourself, but you also extinguish the fire that ignited the passion and drive to pursue your goals in the first place. I remember when I was 8 years old, the recession had started to increase in terms of severity.

Businesses were going bankrupt, people began to move away, and homes were being seized by the bank.

My dad, through all of the financial issues he began to see as the recession began to seep into our family, smiled through the pain. He began to pave his own roads, no matter how many dead ends he hit. He did not let any of us know how hard he worked and never let us feel like we should adjust to a lifestyle that we were not comfortable with.

Every day, he would come home at 2-3 AM at night just so he could get us through the recession and he did. It took a while, but he did not give up. If he had given up, we would have moved to Oklahoma, sold the store my family owned for 12 years, and living a life that would have been full of regrets and constant mockery.

The only reason my family is not in that position now is because my father did not lose that passion and drive burning deep in his heart.

It is because of the fact that he woke up every morning and said, “I will not let this stop me. I will pave my own road and I will get through this.”

There are countless personal stories that I have experienced just like this one, but reading the stories is not going to help. This piece is not just to entertain you when you are bored, or to tell you about the experiences that I have faced.

It is to try and awaken that inner drive and light a fire that will continue to burn in times of darkness and difficulty.

It is to tell every reader out there that going through a rough patch does not mean it is the end. You will get through it as long as you stay focused on your goals and continue to work hard. The motivation you have to get started should not begin to die down because that motivation is what will guide you when you do not know what is ahead of you and give you the tools you need to pave the road that you choose to take next.

(Written by Elizabeth Howard)

Curled up in my bed after a long day at work, I’m scrolling through my usual online news outlets and what’s the latest buzz? Adele and her 2016 North American tour. The last time Adele sang in the United States was in 2011 and she only played in small venues. Now she has concerts in 14 states and Canada and all were sold out in minutes. The woman is an idol, a success story and everyone’s go-to car jam. She’s helped us all through the breakups and the rainy days, and for that we must thank her.

Adele Adkins was born on a normal day like anyone else, so what makes her an international sensation that makes people stop in their tracks in the aisles of Target just to sing the first three lines of ‘Hello’?

Adele has forever changed music. She will go down on the same pages as Etta James and Barbra Streisand. She is this generation’s musical goddess – with good reason. Adele’s perfect combination of raspy and milky-smooth notes can bring even a Cross Fit heavy lifter to their knees, but what makes Adele successful? To me, is how relatable and open she is.

At the beginning of 2015 I wrote down that I wanted to be more like Beyoncé. These were my promises to myself:

1. You can’t please everyone. Make the decision that makes you happy and stop concerning yourself about what that other person is saying about you. Bye Felicia.

2. Stop wasting your time on people who don’t really care about being your life. Life is way too short. Spend your precious time with people that love you and support you. Bye Felicia.

3. Friends are the family you choose. Choose them wisely because the company you keep defines many things in your life. Bye Felicia.

4. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Stop looking at yourself and seeing flaws. They are not flaws but just one part of the masterpiece that makes up who are you. Hello Beyoncé.

5. Every person has a season in your life. Don’t keep poisons in your life. Just like a tree, let the pruning happen in your life if you need to. You will be more beautiful after. Hello Beyoncé.

6. YOU ARE YOUR OWN BEYONCE. Be fabulous and stop letting other people define what is fabulous. Hello Beyoncé.

We go into each year thinking we are going to be more like Beyoncé and Adele – I’m going to exercise more, eat better, read more and spend more time with family, but at some point we all seem to fall off the wagon, and our once-fresh new year aspirations are now jokes in Instagram captions as we post the latest batch of beautiful donuts.

How can we make goals that are realistic? How can we decide from day one to be a Beyoncé or an Adele? How can we be fabulous all year long?

It’s by being honest with ourselves. We need to be our true, authentic selves each and every day, not just to ourselves but also to the world. Man, does that sound terrifying.

Why would I want people to know that I’m having a bad week at work? Or that I miss my loved ones during the holidays? To me, that feels incredibly personal and why would anyone want to know these things about me? It’s because we all go through it, and we shouldn’t go through it alone.

Adele is loved because she is like anyone else, well despite her fame, fortune and beautiful voice. Adele is true to her authentic self through her music. She’s depressed? She writes a heart-wrenching song that we can all relate to. She’s mad? She writes a song that tears apart every piece of that angry memory. We love Adele because a piece of us can be found in every one of her songs.

If we can translate Adele’s ability to be relatable to our every day life, imagine how many people we could connect with? In today’s world there is a sense of need to show people that you’ve “made it,” and believe me, I’m a total victim of this feeling.

Why would I want people to think that I have rough weeks?

They may not think I’m mature or responsible or cool, but the truth of the matter is four years ago, I thought when I turned 22 I would have everything together, and that I would be an “adult.” I was totally wrong. I still want to take naps at 2 p.m., I lose socks like it’s my job, I can never remember to drop off my dry cleaning, and I still call my parents all the time asking them things like what’s wrong with my toilet or how do I cook bacon without setting the smoke detector off?

So who else burns their bacon? Who else still calls home to ask for advice? Who still uses dry shampoo and a hair tie on the mornings where you’re running late to work because 20 minutes of sleep sounded so worth it at the time? This is all me. The full me. The good, the bad and the ugly.

We’re in this together people. Let’s live authentically together. We may not be able to sing our lives like Adele, but we can tell people the truth and bond and grow over the same hopes, dreams and dilemmas.

Be you because, who knows, one day your life could be made into a multi-million dollar album and you wouldn’t want to miss out on that chance.