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The Rear-View is a Teacher

May 10
by
Hayley Basnett
in
Inspirational People
with
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(Written by Hayley Basnett)

“Forget the former things. Do not dwell on the past” -Isaiah 43:18

You always hear people say “Live in the present, don’t worry about the past or the future, just live today.” I should have listened to this advice a long time ago. Holding on to my mistakes or even mistakes others around me made. Constantly living in a state of worry, my life was filled with anxiety and sadness. There was no possible way for me to live fully every day.

Junior year of high school my boyfriend of one year at the time, was driving me home from school and I could just tell something was off. He walked me up to my front porch, sat down, and looked up at me with tears in his eyes, “Hayley, this is so hard for me to tell you and I have been holding it in for almost six months now. I hooked up with someone else.”

As a 16 year old girl my whole world fell to pieces and my self-confidence just crumbled to the ground. I, of course, sat there and cried for a while just asking him why over and over again, but eventually decided that I could forgive him. We continued to date for two more years. It was miserable and I never actually forgave him. I thought about it every time I looked at him and held it over his head constantly. I couldn’t let it go. My anger and anxiety consumed not only my relationship, but my life.

I’m not sure my self-confidence ever fully recovered from that moment, and my present relationship proves that.

Junior year of college, exactly four years after having my heart broken the first time, my current boyfriend told me he kissed his ex over Thanksgiving Break. He told me it meant nothing and that it would never happen again.

Tears welled up in my eyes and I just knew this would be another ruined relationship. Then I thought to myself, no way, I am not losing this one. I knew in my heart that Ryan was the one for me and that if I wanted to be with him I needed to learn to let it go. To let it go is amazing.

I have never been happier or stronger in my life. My faith has flourished and my relationships with my friends, boyfriend, family, and even myself have never been better.

I still have to work at it every day, but it is absolutely worth it. Deep breaths and alone time have become my best friends. I tell myself all the time, “There is nothing you can change about the past. All you can do is learn and move on. Let it go Hayley, just let it go”.

I encourage everyone who reads this to close their eyes and think about things they may still be holding on to from the past. It can be from two days ago or even six years ago. Think about it for five seconds and realize that what is done is done and there is literally nothing you can do about it now. Let it go.

“What ifs” are the worst things you can bring into your life.

The time you spend worrying about the past is time you could be spending doing something positive today. Forget about that test you failed or that time your friend blew you off. Live each day to the fullest and keep your mind in the right now. Yesterday is done, but today is only beginning.

“He fills my life with good things, so that I stay young and strong like an eagle.” -Psalm 103:5

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